My first reaction was “Really?”  Really in the sense that it’s been there 8 years.  Really in the sense that I have neighbors, well, who haven’t taken down their Christmas lights.  Really in the sense that doesn’t the HOA have more pressing needs.  But I’m a fairly busy guy so a few minutes later I was on to something else. 

Well apparently the HOA sent out a bunch of these letters.  Suddenly social media was abuzz with peoples’ reactions and comments – some not so flattering – about the HOA and its rules.  You can imagine.

A couple of days passed and with some nice weather I found myself doing some yard work.  Eyeing the bench, I picked it up and moved it to a side flower bed where it wouldn’t be a violation.  Problem solved.

A couple of days later, I was talking with someone who had taken note that I had moved my bench.   (Wow.  I probably wouldn’t notice if a neighbor painted their house pink, but I again digress.)  Anyway, this person , who had also received a violation, wanted to know why I had caved?  Why I wasn’t down with the struggle to fight the HOA for my bench?

Listen I said.  I’m all for individual liberty, but our neighbors that make up the HOA board and the committees – many are friends of mine.  They are doing a thankless job and are just following the guidelines.  So 1) my friendship with them is more important than the bench and 2) the bench is in violation of the rules … so I moved it.

Seems pretty straightforward to me.

Doing the right thing

The puck was three inches wide. The hole in the plywood was three-and-a-half inches wide. The kid and the stick were 89 feet of ice away. It was about like trying to throw a key into a keyhole from across the street. The prize was $50,000. Might as well been $1 million.

So when 11-year-old Nate Smith made it, why in the world did he give the money back?

Read this and feel better about the world:

There was a charity hockey game to raise money for the youth hockey program in Faribault, Minn., the town where Sidney Crosby played his high school hockey. In the stands was a 48-year-old soybean farmer named Pat Smith and his identical, hockey-loving twin boys, Nick and Nate, from nearby Owatonna.

Before the game, Pat and Nate bought a $10 raffle ticket for a $50,000 intermission shot. They had to put somebody’s name on the ticket, but Nate had just gotten his wrist out of a cast, so they wrote “Nick Smith” on the back.

Just before intermission, Nick wanted to go outside and play with some buddies. “If they call my name,” Nick kidded Nate, “you take the shot.”

Right. As if that’s going to happen.

They look so much alike and play so much alike, who would know? And, besides, it was Nate who put Nick’s name on the ticket in the first place when he could’ve just as easily put his own name on it, right? What was the harm?

People often mistake them for each other anyway. “From behind, even I can’t tell them apart sometimes,” Pat says. For fun once, in second grade, Nick went into Nate’s class and Nate into Nick’s. Nobody was the wiser — until Nick’s teacher started handing out a test. That’s when Nate panicked, stood up and announced, “I’m not Nicholas!” before he ran back to his own room.

Back to the hockey rink. You’ve already guessed what happened next: Nick’s name was called. No Nick. So Nate and his bad arm went down on the ice and lined up the preposterously difficult shot. Nate’s dad and another parent were behind the goal, watching. Nate let it fly.

“Wow,” said the other parent, “that’s right on line!” 

Nate, left, and Nick Smith returned a check for $50,000, but their honesty was rewarded. Odds On Promotions, which ran the charity raffle, gave the Faribault and Owatonna youth hockey associations $10,000 each.

“I lost [sight of] it,” Pat said. But the crowd’s whip-crack roar let him know what happened. It slid perfectly, impossibly through!

Nate started going bonkers at the other end of the ice, high-fiving and pogo-sticking. Pat was laughing. Fandemonium ensured. The crowd noise only grew louder. Somebody outside took Nick by the shoulders and said, “Your brother just won $50,000!!!”

A man from Odds On Promotions came and gave them a paper to sign and said the check would be delivered a few days after that and, wow, just, congratulations!

“Is it really ours?” the kids asked their dad.

“Guess so!” he said.

“I was going to buy a new hockey stick,” Nate said. “And give some to my brother, maybe. Like, $1,000. And give some to my school. And our hockey association.”

Nick was hoping to buy his first laptop. They both needed new bikes.

Their dad was thinking: “Fifty grand? Five kids, one daughter in college, one in high school? This is really going to help.”

But when they all got home that night, something didn’t feel right. After the kids went to bed, Pat and his wife, Kim, had the same little mosquito buzzing their consciences.

But why? The money would’ve been paid by a monstrous out-of-state insurance behemoth, since the youth hockey association had taken out a policy. Who worries about monstrous out-of-state insurance behemoths?

The next morning, the parents were about to tell the kids they were going to have to give the money back when the boys floored them with their own announcement. They didn’t think they should take the money. “What if our friends ask us about it?” Nick asked.

It was settled then. They all decided that having to lie about it just wasn’t worth $50,000. “We kept thinking about signing that paper [saying Nick had made the shot]. It just felt wrong,” Pat says.

That morning, he called the man in charge and told him what had really happened. Yes, his boy who had made the shot signed the back of the ticket, but he’d signed his brother’s name. Wrong kid.

That’s a lot of soybeans to eat.

“It probably would’ve come out eventually,” shrugs Pat.

The boys were disappointed, yet relieved.

“I’m glad we did the right thing,” Nate says.

As a dad, you look for teachable moments for your kids, but this is the most expensive one I’ve ever heard of. Bravo. Smith Family for Senate.

“It’s just easier,” Pat says. “And I hope it’s a lesson that can stand for all the boys’ decisions for the rest of their lives.”

This all happened back in August and the Smiths soon found out something they didn’t know. When a farming family that could really use the money turns down the money because of their own morality? That’s news. That gets rewarded.

Odds On Promotions, which ran the event, gave the Faribault and Owatonna youth hockey associations $10,000 each.

Crosby’s school, Shattuck-St. Mary’s, paid for the boys to go to a three-week hockey camp.

The Minnesota Vikings heard about it and brought the whole family to a game, let them hang out on the field, put them in a VIP box.

The Minnesota Wild brought them onto the ice during an intermission and set up another shot — this one into a foot-wide hole from five feet away. And Nick shooting instead of Nate. He made it. The prize wasn’t $50,000 this time, but it was a new Polaris ATV, which the boys got when they turned 12 on New Year’s Eve.

All of which proves righteousness has its own rewards.

“But,” adds their dad, “we really did want to be on ESPN.”

Hey, Boss, you still reading?

First some background. Tim won 2 national championships in college football as the quarterback of the Florida Gators. He also won the Heisman. But there was a lot of talk from “people in the know” that he wasn’t ready or even capable of being an NFL quarterback. The typical criticisms: He is a running quarterback; Florida didn’t run a pro-style offense; and his throwing mechanics and footwork were criticized. But there is no fool proof way to evaluate a college quarterbacks success at the next level.  Just ask the teams and all those prognosticators that selected or advocated for JaMarcus Russell, Ryan Leaf, Akili Smith, Cade McNown … or teams that passed on Tom Brady. I could go on and on. Tebow was drafted by the Denver Bronco’s with the 25^th pick in the draft. It’s fair to say, the pick was widely criticized.

In his first season in Denver, he played sparingly in six games as a back-up. He also had the best-selling jersey in the entire NFL. What?  A back-up quarterback had the best selling jersey. Yep.

Fast forward to this season; Tebow is again buried on the Bronco’s depth chart. But the team gets off to a rough start winning only once in their first five games. Tebow becomes the starter. In his first start, Tebow and the Broncos struggled in the first three-and-a-half quarters against the Dolphins, but rallied from a 15–0 deficit in the last three minutes to win the game, 18–15, in overtime. Denver became the first team in NFL history to win a game after being down by at least 15 points with three minutes to play in a game. Wow. The Bronco’s have gone 5 and 1 since Tebow took over. Not too shabby.

But it’s the way Denver is winning that is raising some eyebrows. In one win, Tebow only attempted 8 passes. This is a league where it’s not unusual to see a quarterback attempt 40 passes per game.  Of course, he is running a lot.  But despite the success, the criticism of Tebow’s play continues and loudly.  Why?

First, let me vent on some of the football experts who just can’t believe Tebow and the Broncos are winning. When a team successfully runs the ball, as Denver does, it has benefits that reach far and wide.

• It shortens the game. The clock keeps running on running plays. This gives the other teams less chances to score. Games will be close. Tebow has shown he plays pretty well under pressure.
• It keeps your defense rested. Possession of the football on sustained drives, keeps your defense on the sidelines resting.  When they do get on the field, they can go all out. Is it any coincidence that Denver’s defense suddenly looks awesome?
• Offensive linemen love to run block.  It’s simple. When pass blocking, offensive linemen retreat at the snap of the ball and take the punishment the defensive linemen charging ahead. But when a team runs the ball, offensive linemen get to dish out the physical punishment. They love that and a running team usually wears down their opponents.  Denver looks pretty good at the end of games, don’t they?
• It’s a passing league nowadays because of mostly rule changes, but that has implications.  Smaller, quicker defenders to stop the pass might not match up so well against the run. 
• It sets up the pass! In order to stop the run, defensive teams have to crowd the line of scrimmage. Then it’s a little easier to throw it over their heads! Guess where Denver ranks in yards per completion over the last 3 games. No, guess. Okay, #1. And it’s not even close.

I remember when my Redskins could run the football and used to win super bowls, but I digress.  Football ain’t rocket science, but it sure is big business.

So why does “Tim Tremendous” seem to have so many haters. Is it because, as some speculate, of his strong and public displays of his Christian faith. I don’t think so. Not entirely. The NFL is full of strong and outwardly so Christians – even top quarterbacks – like Drew Brees. TV shows images of players praying and praying together all the time. I don’t think that’s it.

It is interesting to note though that in 2010, the NCAA created a new rule for football dubbed “The Tebow Rule” which banned messages on eye paint. During his college football career, Tebow frequently wore biblical verses on his eye black. In the 2009 BCS Championship Game, he wore John 3:16 on his eye paint, and as a result, 92 million people searched “John 3:16″ on Google during or shortly after the game. Amazing and awesome.

Anyway, as simple as it sounds, Tebow is hated by many because he is disrupting the status quo. He is doing something the so called “experts” and others say can’t be done. If you saw the movie or read the book “Moneyball,” you know Billy Bean was hated inside of baseball because he was challenging decades of group think about what was important in baseball. Tim is changing how people need to think about what makes a successful NFL quarterback. And I know it’s just sports, but people are crazy about their football. (This is why lots of people also hate Tebow – because while at Florida he routinely beat their alma mater, now in the NFL he is beating their team, or because their team has a terrible quarterback.)

This happens all the time. A LOT of folk just don’t like change. Is someone creating some change in your life? Perhaps you’ve been an agent of change and felt the hate. I’m here to tell you to grab a copy of “Who Moved My Cheese” and embrace it – change that is. It’s all around us and here to stay.

Enjoy your football this weekend. It’s “Tebow Time.”

“Chad Bradford grew up the youngest child of a lower-middle class family in a small town called Byram, Mississippi, outside of the larger one called Jackson.“Country” is how he describes himself. Not long before Chad’s second birthday his father suffered a stroke that nearly killed him, and left him paralyzed. The doctors had told his father that he’d never walk again. His father insisted this just wasn’t true. He looked up from his bed, stone-faced, and announced his intention to raise his three boys and earn a living. Through an act of will, which he also thought of as an act of God, he did just that. By Chad’s seventh birthday his father was able not only to walk but, in a fashion, to play catch with his son.  He would never again be able to lift his arm over his shoulder, so he couldn’t throw properly. But he could get a glove up to stop a ball. And after he caught the ball from Chad, he would toss it back to him underhanded. The strange throwing motion stuck in the little boy’s mind.

Playing catch with his father was one of the things that made Chad happiest. His father didn’t have any particular ambition for him, except that he should be happy, remain a Christian, and that his happiness and his Christianity should occur within the confines of Mississippi. The Bradfords didn’t know any professional baseball players; they didn’t know anyone who knew any professional baseball players. But twice Chad was asked by his school teachers to write autobiographical essays, and both times he took professional baseball as his theme. At the age of eight he wrote: What I Want to Be When I Grow Up. 

If I were A grown up
I would be a baseball player
And I would play for the Dodgers
I hope to play for the Cardinals too.
I hope to play for the Oriole too
And for all the teams I would
Play shotestop.

“Shotesop” being the phonetic spelling, in Byram, Mississippi. Five years later, when Chad was thirteen, his teacher asked him and the other students to write the stories of their lives, as they looked back on them from their imagined old age. With the perspective of hindsight Chad Bradford could see that he had married right out of school, had two children, a son and a daughter, and become not a big league shortstop but a big league pitcher. He imagined no other future for himself and so it was lucky that no other future awaited him. Right after his high school graduation, at the age of eighteen, he married his girlfriend, Jenny Lack, who soon bore him a son, then a daughter. Between the two births, at the age of twenty-three, Chad Bradford made his debut in the major leagues with the Chicago White Sox.  The power of an imagination can arise from what it refuses to foresee.”

This little excerpt leaves out the important fact that Chad made it to the big leagues basically throwing underhanded! Just like his father.

Wanda and I have often talked over the years about the power of the mind (and tongue) for good. As we all get older it seems to me that we have less and less worthy dreams and aspirations. We hold back our imaginations out of fear of failure (there is no such thing), ridicule, or through excuses about being too busy, too tired, or too old. Nonsense. 

Let your imagination run wild and then chase after it.

Deep breath Wanda!!! I am trusting GOD to help me stay centered and focused on what I am doing–enjoying myself with ME!! Looked at my watch–lunch in 25 minutes! Okay, now I am laughing out loud!!! I got my joy back!!

 Let me keep my word. I was puzzled by this feeling of sadness and melancholy. Wasn’t I surrounded by beautiful red rocks, a cloudless blue sky, gorgeous green and amazing accommodations? I am not scared of the dark nor do I have problems being alone (in fact, I believed I cherished my alone times).  So what was happening?  And then it became clear to me. Although I vacation much and travel constantly, away from family, friends and business colleagues, I always have my Personal Digital Assistants (iPhone, iPad) with me and they are always ON. This allows for anyone who knows me to call, text or email and…well… get a response from me. But I realized when I looked closer at my sadness that the PDAs also kept me connected—to others—but how connected was I to myself? When I examined the sadness even closer—I realized that I needed to be reachable. When there was no signal in the Canyon where I was staying, this meant I could not receive email, text or phone calls.  No one could reach me!  But the truth is that a few family and friends and business colleagues knew where I was and if they really needed to get a message to me, they could. It wasn’t about them reaching me—it was about me needing to be needed by others—needing the diversion that others bring. The diversion from what you may ask? The diversion from having true alone time with me! When did I ever slow down enough…get quiet and get focused on me and only me. Not what do others want or need…but what do I want? What do I need? What is important to me right now? Where am I? And am I doing what is required to ensure my needs are met versus being distracted by the needs of others? What is my true value not defined by titles like Daughter, Sister, Aunt, Friend, Neighbor, Godmother, Leader, Partner, etc. etc. I had never done this in my adult life—just went away from everything and everyone – cut-off contact completely —just to be with…ME. I used to laugh and make jokes when I heard people say “I have to find myself.”  “Look in the mirror” I would jest or “I see you clearly—you are right where you are!” But have you ever dropped something in the grass and when you looked for it…you couldn’t find it?!  You know it’s there because you just dropped it…but now it’s surrounded by grass and dirt and whatever else is in the grass. But you know it’s there, you just can’t see it! “I used to love to laugh and I don’t as much anymore.” (you’re in the grass). “What happened to me, I used to be so much fun.” (deep in the grass). “I hate this job but it pays the bills.” (rolling in the grass and itching). When you really get silent…no distractions…and listen with intention…trust me in this…you will hear from GOD…and you will connect to YOU.  And speaking of grass…there is a saying that the grass is always greener on the other side. I say…the grass is the greenest on the inside! Here’s to YOU!

“I long, as does every human being, to be at home wherever I find myself.” – Maya Angelou

But you know I have to keep it real right!? I went through withdrawal symptoms, a melancholy and deep sadness invaded my space on day two. Instead of fighting the feeling, I explored it–invited it to tell me what it came to teach me. In my next blog, I will share more about that experience. But for now I’d only like to suggest and urge you to try…moments of silence.

In love and more clarity

Wanda